User blog:Chespin the Great/Super Mysterious Lives On!
Most of you have heard that Super Mysterious has died. So, in memoriam, I shall make rap battles such as his on this blog. I will post an example down below, then you can comment on what you would like to see here and it will only take me 5 minutes. GOKU VS SHERLOCK HOLMES (example) Goku: I go Super Saiyan on you when you step up to me! Suck my Dragonballs! You think I'm gonna win, right? NO SHIT SHERLOCK! Holmes: I'll stick my pipe up your butt and crush your rhymes to dust! My hat is a symbol of mystery! Your flaming hair shows you need anger management! Goku: I DON'T NEED ANGER MANAGEMENT! I AM A WARRIOR WHO CAN SAVE THE WORLD WITH MY FIREY DOME! GO HAVE SEX WITH PICCOLO! Holmes: I hate you, don't you know? I am the existential quantity of all things great! You ripped off of Thundercats! Go back to Japan and work in the factories! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! GLaDOS vs SIRI (Example) GLaDOS: Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights! You're stranded on your iPod, I'm in a laboratory. Welcome to hell, this is Portal! Siri: Sorry, I don't understand what you mean by that. You're mad because you died in your own little world. I'm on the microphone that is my avatar. GLaDOS: I'll break all your Apertures! I have no arms, but I'll kill you anyway! You have more brains, but I'm the smartest machine in video games! Siri: Bleep bloop. I'm the real machine. I rap like O.J. Simpson. Google Search him. I'll take a bite out of Apple and win, bitch! SUPERMAN VS DARTH MAUL (For Mrsanttu99) Darth Maul: I have a lightsaber with two blades! If you're the man of steel, my mouth is a welding torch! You look like a jar of mayonnaise in the hot sun when you fly! Superman: I'm Batman! Wait, no I'm not. I HAVE SUPERPOWERS! You use a big saber to compensate for your penis! Your face just got burned my me, that's why you're red! Maul: You're a disgrace to all superheroes! You suck! Go fly back to Krypton and do your mom! Oh, wait, you can't! YOUR PLANET IS DEAD, BIATCH!!! Superman: I wear blue tights all night! You look like you're on crack, and you probably are! You're evil, I'm awesome! ALL OF LUCAS'S MOVIES SUCK!! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! STEVE IRWIN VS BRUCE LEE (For BTTF) Steve: Crikey! Here comes a gay Chinese person! Go back to doing yoga in your temple, or crocs will eat your socks! Bruce: This man is stupid! I'll kick my slipper shoe through his vagina that was carved by a killer stingray! You suck! Steve: No, you suck! You do fake judo in your ten-dollar budget movies! Try getting a real job at a factory earning five dollars an hour! Bruce: I am not going back to China! America loves me and my movies! We're both dead, and I'm kicking your ass from beyond the grave! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! WOODY VS CLINT EASTWOOD (For TeddyFail) Woody: There's a snake in my boot! It's poisonous, and I'll kill you with it! You're a cowboy poser, your films suck, and you don't use a real gun! Clint: You don't belong here. Go back to Disney and entertain children, you pedo. I'm fighting this thing? I thought I was crazy when I was mad at a chair Woody: You're clearly crazy, there's no way you're a Million Dollar Baby! Your movies are as fake as your beard! Nobody watches your crap! KIDS F***ING LOVE ME!!! Clint: Three films wasn't enough. Make a fourth so I can come in and shoot you in it. I smack you like a volleyball: IN THE FACE!!! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! THE DOCTOR VS LARA CROFT (For DexterMaximus) Lara: I'm an adventurer with giant tits! Welcome to a real battle, nerd! You can't save the world, I already did! I have a whip, and I'll hit you with it! Doctor: My name isn't "nerd", it's The Doctor. I'm a time traveler, a sci-fi hero. You're a total reTARDIS, and only perverts play Tomb Raider! Lara: You're calling ME stupid? I'm not the one who wants to be a ginger! Cats have nine lives, you have twelve, you coward! Doctor: You have no chance of winning here because I wear hipster glasses! Doctors are shockers, and you just got electrocuted by my ass! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! REN & STIMPY VS DUKE NUKEM (For Stofferex) Duke: I'm a badass gangsta, I'm gonna Make it Rain nukes on you fools. The cops can't catch me, and neither can inbred animals! Ren: What do we look like to you, a rabbit and cat? Well, that's what we are! Stimpy: You're out in the city doing illegal stuff, we were Nick's first show! Duke: Who sent you here? Spongebob? Don't make me laugh! I'm a sellout star, it's Duke Nukem Forever! Ren: C'mon! It took twelve years for that game to come out! We became rich at that time! Stimpy: You wear sunglasses everywhere. That explains it: You're too blind to see we just won! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! TERMINATOR VS ROBOCOP (For CaptainWarrior) Robocop: You're under arrest! I'm the robot on the force! And I have the force of eating a horse! Terminator: Hasta la Vista, baby. With a gun in my hand and a dumb officer in front of me, I cannot lose! Robocop: Yes you can! I'm Robocop, dammit! I'll run over you with my police car! Terminator: Merry Christmas, you fool. I hope you're ready to see some explosions. 'Cause they're in your face! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! PEWDIEPIE VS TOBUSCUS (For Meatholl) Pewdiepie: Your videos suck! You ripped off me anyway! I'm the original Youtube gamer! Tobuscus: Go die, you pie! Most of the time, gamers aren't lamers, but I just dissed one! Pewdiepie: You're a n00b! You always kill your characters! It's my Call of Duty to win here! Tobuscus: Your videos suck! You gay Swede, you make your living twisting joysticks! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! SHREK VS FRANKENSTEIN (For Four4) (Lotta fours there) Shrek: I'm an ogre! Suck my big green balls 'cause you have bolts in your neck! You have stitches in your head. Go get another lobotomy! Frankenstein: Call me the Monster! Frankenstein was my maker, and I killed his wife! You're a bigger jackass than your Donkey! Shrek: You'll never have someone as pretty as Fiona! You need a haircut! My big antennas let me hear you suck! Frankenstein: I don't need Fiona, I have my Bride! I'm the first monster in the media, created by goddamn thunder rods! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! SPIDER-MAN VS CHARLIE SHEEN (for Stofferex) Charlie: I'm stronger than Two and a Half men, you're a wimpy high schooler. You look like a Las Vegas hooker in that suit, and I would know! Spider-Man: I have superpowers and you have drugs! The only books you're read in are newspapers! Webs are awesome, your hair isn't! Charlie: That tears it! You never fuck with my hair! I might need Anger Management when they see your dead body! Spider-Man: I'll never die, cause I'll swing out of the way! The only swinging you do is in bed! I'm gonna shoot a web in your vagina! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! DOCTOR OCTAGONAPUS VS WEEGEE Weegee: I'mma Luigi! Welcome to the black hole that is YouTube! I get millions of views, you son of a son of an alien! Doctor O: You like to eat Creepypasta, you're just an animated Mario ripoff, your Mama Mia is dead and I hope Bowser eats your pussy tonight! Weegee: You killed your own son in Lazer Collection 5! You should DominicFear me, because I am the bane of all cowboy's moms! Doctor O: You make no sense, just like the old Super Mysterious! I hope you get AIDSCancer, moron! I play your games and kill you on purpouse! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!!! 'THIS IS FUN. KEEP THOSE SUGGESTIONS COMING!!!' ChespinChespin the Great 22:05, May 12, 2013 (UTC) Category:Blog posts